sympathy for the (half) Tao

Please allow me to introduce myself

I'm a man of wealth and taste

I've been around for a long, long years

Stole many a man's soul and faith

And I was 'round when Jesus Christ

Had his moment of doubt and pain

Made damn sure that Pilate

Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you

Hope you guess my name

But what's puzzling you

Is the nature of my game

I stuck around St. Petersburg

When I saw it was a time for a change

Killed the czar and his ministers

Anastasia screamed in vain

I rode a tank

Held a general's rank

When the blitzkrieg raged

And the bodies stank

Pleased to meet you

Hope you guess my name, oh yeah

Ah, what's puzzling you

Is the nature of my game, oh yeah

(woo woo, woo woo)

I watched with glee

While your kings and queens

Fought for ten decades

For the gods they made

(woo woo, woo woo)

I shouted out,

"Who killed the Kennedys?"

When after all

It was you and me

(who who, who who)

Let me please introduce myself

I'm a man of wealth and taste

And I laid traps for troubadours

Who get killed before they reached Bombay

(woo woo, who who)

Pleased to meet you

Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah

(who who)

But what's puzzling you

Is the nature of my game, oh yeah, get down, baby

(who who, who who)

Pleased to meet you

Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah

But what's confusing you

Is just the nature of my game

(woo woo, who who)

Just as every cop is a criminal

And all the sinners saints

As heads is tails

Just call me Lucifer

'Cause I'm in need of some restraint

(who who, who who)

So if you meet me

Have some courtesy

Have some sympathy, and some taste

(woo woo)

Use all your well-learned politesse

Or I'll lay your soul to waste, um yeah

(woo woo, woo woo)

Pleased to meet you

Hope you guessed my name, um yeah

(who who)

But what's puzzling you

Is the nature of my game, um mean it, get down

(woo woo, woo woo)